Dee-Dee Diamond
1 min readAug 10, 2023

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The Clumsy, Chef Tosses a Salad… (fit for my ex- mother-in-law)

First it requires a broken, shattered green-glass bottle of extra virgin cold-pressed olive oil… to fall out of my unsteady grip, then hit the plastic container of walnuts, next shelf down, (in the pantry) … to knock open. 🙄😮😏

The freed nuts tumbled thru the air, then dived, all over, into the pool of liquid gold. (Not easy to plan…) 🙃

The green smashed, rough glass shards are the crunch, the shelled, scattered pieces of walnut like small brown brains, 🧠🧠🧠 serve for protein. 🤹‍♀🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️

As the golden flowing olive oil formed itself into a glistening round puddle/bowl, with walnut halves, floating in between sharp tossed chunks of green pointy glass, along with generous splinters of glistening dots.

For extra zest the floor chipped… sprinkling tiny black flecks like pepper, in the mixed salad. All this mess formed “a salad fit for my Ex-Mother-in-Law” …on my shiny tiled kitchen floor. 😛😱😰

LOL! 🤣

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Dee-Dee Diamond

Born & raised in Brooklyn, 80 years, ago. Interviewed by The Brooklyn Historical Society. I published a funny book called” First Stop Brooklyn” it's on Amazon.